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Next Item: The Very Naughty Dog?
Previous item: ABC Wednesday – the letter ‘X’
Dinner for one?
Posted on July 4, 2009 in Conversations, Food and Drink, Life, the Universe and Everything, Wildlife by Jay21 Comments »

DFO-1

It was Son No. 2′s birthday last weekend, but he naturally didn’t want to spend it rushing his hungover friends out and tidying up so that his parents could come and visit, so we very kindly left it till later in the week to drive up to celebrate with him. It worked out nicely anyway, because it meant I could get down to London the night before the premiere.  We’d have gone up north on Sunday if he’d wanted, but Wednesday suited us very nicely.

One way and another, we had an interesting day.  After he’d opened his gifts and done his usual ‘you shouldn’t have’ routine, and his girlfriend had got home from work, they climbed into the back of the car, I got into the front, OH put the roof down, and we drove off into the countryside.

Son No. 2 lives in a city, but it’s not far to go before you’re in the Derbyshire dales and it’s absolutely beautiful.  We drove with the wind in our hair, past drystone walls and sheep and cows and derelict buildings which somehow managed to look picturesque in a way that our local derelict building just don’t, and we drove past a huge and peaceful reservoir, and we came to a delightful-looking pub where we stopped and found a table and asked for the menus.

I ordered the pot-roast lamb.

DFO-2

Yes, that is my pot-roast lamb.  Mine.  Not ‘our’ pot-roast lamb, my pot-roast lamb!  And we don’t even have a dog yet, to take the left-overs home to!  Great heavens above … I looked around the table.  One steak and kidney pie to my left, one lasagne and one steak dinner opposite – yep, I was supposed to get through that on my own!  Needless to say, I couldn’t do it, and when the waiter returned for our plates I asked him about that.

Waiter:  “Was everything alright with your food?”

Me: “Um … yes, it was lovely.  But, tell me, was I supposed to eat all that by myself?”

Waiter:  “Ahahaha!”

Me:  “No, really.  That was enough for a family of four!  Has anyone ever finished one of those things?”

Waiter (pause for thought with creased brow):  “I think someone did, once … ”

So tell me, why do they do that?  Why do they continue cooking over-large portions, when they just get sent back to the kitchen half-eaten?  Does the chef have a large dog, or a tankful of pirhanas or something?

Anyway.  After dinner, we all felt we could do with a little walk to shake everything down a tad, so on the way back we parked the car and set off up the nearest hill.  The place is full of them – hills everywhere you look, unlike here, where it’s flat everywhere you look.  It was quite a novelty!

DFO-4

I think it was about 300 yards along and a hundred yards up that I said ‘Oh fuck … ‘ and turned round to see how far we’d got because my legs had turned to jelly, but the others kept walking, so I followed on.  To be fair it was a beautiful evening, with the air all balmy and warm, and little flowers dotting the hillside among the fronds of bracken and the sheep gurgling to each other.  Son No. 2′s girlfriend asked me what the sticky stuff was at the bottom of the stalks and I showed her the little leaf hopper hiding inside and she didn’t freak out.

DFO-5

I didn’t wreck an ankle on the stones and ruts, and nobody’s stomach burst.  And eventually we did get ourselves down the hillside and back to the car in one piece.  It was lovely, and very rural.

The stile at the bottom was a challenge though.  I managed okay, with OH being very chivalrous and helping me down solicitously, and Son No. 2′s girlfriend managed too, desperately resisting all offers of help, but being helped anyway, quite against her better judgement.

DFO-3

Heaven knows what any passing motorist must have thought.

21 Responses to “Dinner for one?”

  1. on 04 Jul 2009 at 2:30 am1Ruth Hull Chatlien

    That is a monstrously large serving of meat. And I thought the chicken breasts Michael grilled tonight were huge.

    The last photo is hilarious.

  2. on 04 Jul 2009 at 2:31 am2Ruth Hull Chatlien

    P.S. I’m thrilled I was the first commenter for once!

  3. on 04 Jul 2009 at 6:01 am3Sistertex

    Looked like a meal for 4 to be sure! It did look tasty though. Sounds like a pleasant way to spend a day for sure. Final photo was pretty funny….glad you didn’t ask us to guess what was going on. ;)

  4. on 04 Jul 2009 at 10:58 am4sandy

    a fun time had by all..put into the memory bank hahah

  5. on 04 Jul 2009 at 11:54 am5Baino

    Oh my! Lamb is like lobster here very expensive, I think we export most and what’s left costs a bomb! I’d have made the effort! Looks so green and sunny . .love your ‘peeky’ sheep!

  6. on 04 Jul 2009 at 12:38 pm6Granny Grimble

    Hi Jay
    Sorry I haven’t commented on your recent blogs, but poor old computer has been(and still is) very poorly. Each time I use it, it dies a little more, so no posting or commenting I’m afraid. Poor Putie is going away to hospital any day now for an undisclosed length of time and a very large ransom to get it back! But, like Arnie, I’ll be back!
    Leeta

  7. on 04 Jul 2009 at 2:03 pm7kate

    This is why I don’t eat out anymore – though your meal did look lovely – around here there is a lot of places serving tasteless overpriced food and, as a cook I just can’t bear to part with my cash for it!!

    I love Derbyshire – its so peaceful!

  8. on 05 Jul 2009 at 9:19 am8Thelma and Louise

    Looks like an American portion, Jay! My, my!

    Pop over and see my new blog, my friend. I thought I sent you a message inviting you there, but I’m incognito there. (It’s D, but don’t tell anyone!)

    Peace -

  9. on 05 Jul 2009 at 5:20 pm9petra michelle

    Hilarious and endearing, Jay! I can picture you at dinner playing with your magnetic cutlery while wondering where all of that food was going. Wholeheartedly agree that most restaurants still think that more is better when just the opposite is true. Then, I suppose there are the customers that insist on getting what they believe is their money’s worth while their arteries are hardening! Whew! Where did that come from? :) ) The last photo is hilarious!

    p.s. *laughed* at your comment on Father of the Bride. You’re so right! If we couldn’t dream, what is the point of getting up each morning?! I’m wishing I could be in the UK now with all that’s surrounding Michael Jackson’s death. I have a tribute up “Angels Moonwalking on The Tonight Show,” if you’re interested, Jay.

  10. on 05 Jul 2009 at 6:33 pm10JD at I Do Things

    Oh, NOM! That lamb dinner looks amazing. I bet I could take it on. Maybe not for lunch, tho.

    Hey, I saw your boyfriend yesterday in Public Enemies. Have you seen it yet? It’s very good, and JD is AWESOME!

  11. on 05 Jul 2009 at 7:51 pm11Sistertex

    Hi Jay,
    I wanted to ask if you’d seen this website.

    http://www.imdb.com/media/rm323782656/tt1014759

    This leads you to a photo as Johnny Depp as the Madd Hatter in Tim Burton’s ‘Alice In Wonderland’ due to come out in March 2010.

    Sistertex

  12. on 05 Jul 2009 at 8:52 pm12liz

    You can have George if you like. After eating the cake yesterday he ate my roasted butternut squash today. He is not the most popular dog in this house at the moment.

  13. on 05 Jul 2009 at 11:40 pm13Jeni

    That’s a fair ol’ plateful you got there. I love the pic of son No.2 and girlfriend. lol.

  14. on 06 Jul 2009 at 12:45 am14Jeannine

    Hey Jay!! Now, that’s my kind of lunch! I’d take home the leftovers and eat them for another 2 days!! (That means less cooking from me!!)

    And that last pic is too funny – bet the GF doesn’t much like it though…

  15. on 06 Jul 2009 at 3:21 am15Moon

    Welcome to America !!!.. we have to deal with those size portions every day !

    I love the braken, reminds me of home …

  16. on 06 Jul 2009 at 10:45 am16Jay

    Ruth – Insanely large, isn’t it? And only one person in the waiter’s memory had managed to finish it, so why would they continue to serve them so big?

    Couldn’t resist posting that picture. We were all cracking up at the time. Truth is, B hates being lifted off her feet, and Son No. 2 knew it. LOL!

    Sistertex – I would have been insane to ask you lot to guess what was going on. ROFL!

    It was a great day out. Lovely to see family, isn’t it?

    Sandy – Absolutely, Sandy! :D

    Baino – I guess your sheep don’t peek, huh? LOL!

    Lamb is expensive here, too, compared to other meat, especially Welsh lamb. It’s actually cheaper to import NZ lamb (we never seem to get Aussie lamb, why is that?) than to eat local! Crazy!!

    Granny – Oh dear .. so sorry you are still having computer problems. I hope you get that fixed up soon! I’ll be watching for your new posts, you’re in my reader and I get notified. ;)

    Kate – I agree, but this was neither tasteless or overpriced, just too much! Actually, they were the best veg I’ve had for a long time, perfectly cooked and piping hot, and the mangetout not stringy as they often are. Weird … usually the quality food does come in smaller portions, doesn’t it?

    Thelma And Louise – I’m so glad you posted a comment. I’ve been thinking about you. You did send me a link and I popped over and commented but then forgot to put you in my news reader and lost the link. It’s in there now! Thanks! :)

    Petra – You’re right, it really is time that restaurants stopped all the waste and customers realised that it’s not good for them to stuff themselves silly. Absolutely.

    I’ve had a busy few days, and also I’ve been very tired, but I’ll pop over and catch up very soon!

    JD – It was delicious, just Too Much!

    My boyfriend! I think both Vanessa and OH might have something to say about that. ROFL! Yes, I saw Public Enemies yesterday – in fact I was probably there when you wrote that. Mmmm! Awesome, and beautiful, huh?

    Sistertex – Ah yes .. the Mad Hatter. Seemingly, Tim and Johnny have found a way to top Willy Wonka! ROFL!

    I have seen it, but thanks for the link! I’m always happy to have links to JD info I might have missed. :)

    Liz – Hahaha! But he isn’t a greyhound, Liz. I can’t have George, it would be breaking with tradition! I must pop over and catch up though. LOL!

    Jeni – Isn’t it? How do they expect anyone to eat it? It should be a case of ‘bring me the pot roast lamb, a side of veg, and four sets of cutlery, shouldn’t it?

    Jeannine – I thought of you! And I thought of Sid and the freezer … but it was a blazing hot day and we still had several hours before we’d be home. Regretfully, I left it behind. :(

    B didn’t mind, she knew I was going to publish it – we laughed about it at the time. She’s a lovely girl and a good sport.

    Moon – Yes, we’ve met your American portion sizes! LOL! The bracken is lovely, isn’t it? We could only see the sheep when they popped their heads up!

  17. on 06 Jul 2009 at 6:35 pm17Maureen

    Oh yikes! I can never handle restaurant portions… I always come home with a doggy bag. Unfortunately for our doggy, I finish it off the next day!

  18. on 06 Jul 2009 at 7:28 pm18Mr. NIghttime

    Yep, that’s an American portion, to be sure. as for the other photo, all I can say is, GET A ROOM, YOU TWO!!! ;-)

  19. on 06 Jul 2009 at 8:43 pm19meleah rebeccah

    The photos are wonderful and I am drooling over your pot-roast lamb!! I would LOVE to taste some of that! Yummmmmmmmmy!

  20. on 12 Jul 2009 at 10:26 pm20becky

    I must say , when it comes to son number 2 helping off and down things , I havnt trusted him since the snow … thats all ill say .

  21. on 13 Jul 2009 at 7:50 pm21Jay

    Maureen – I have a friend who does that. She goes out to eat, brings home the leftovers and uses them for the next day. Seems very sensible to me.

    Mr N – Tee hee! He was just helping her down. Sheesh! LOL!

    Well, we should have Sid home tomorrow, so any portions that size in the future will be put to good use.

    Meleah – It was very good! Just .. too big. :p

    Becky – Hahaha! I know! He tried, though. You know he does. ;)

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