One thing I used to say to my boys that they absolutely hated was ‘take what you want, and pay for it’. I explained that this meant that they had the free choice to do as they pleased in this life, but that if they chose unwisely (for instance, not obeying the house rules) they would pay for that decision, one way or another. Whether they’re scarred by it, who knows? Whether they repeat this to their own children, only time will tell.

“Today if you throw out the phrase “Who do you think you are?” in anger … kids are apt to just go google themselves.”

ROFL! So very true! And the sad thing is, they’ll probably get an answer of sorts, too!

So what will be the phrases the new generation takes with it? I’m talking about the phrases that we, in our generation created.

My daughters went into instant depression after being scolded with these words … “That’s it! No watching Dukes of Hazard tonight!” … It still makes them shutter. (and they are moms themselves now) When their children get older what will they remember?

Today if you throw out the phrase “Who do you think you are?” in anger … kids are apt to just go google themselves.

‘You can always be better than you are’ .. no, I don’t think that’s true. At least, it’s only true up to a point. I understand the sentiment, but it’s like teachers telling us ‘there’s no such word as ‘can’t”, which quite clearly isn’t true either. There are clearly a whole heap of things that each of us as individuals can’t do – from stupid things like reach the roof of a house while standing on the driveway to building a nuclear bomb in our kitchens. As motivators, both of those phrases will work with some people, but have the opposite effect with others.

Sandy – Oh, for the ability to be so philosophical! I might know it’s not worth it, but things still upset me.

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My mother’s favorite platitude was, “You can always be better than you are.” Which of course is true, but also means you spend your entire life analyzing what you do and whether it’s good enough– which, of course could always be better.

Doesn’t leave you too many places to go, I must say.

So I hear you!

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I think I’ve even said that one myself, even jokingly.

I don’t understand parents who curse at their kids or even use profanity around them, so disrespectful.

I’d be crushed into a heap if my mom (or father I don’t care for too much)cursed at me. Maybe I’m too sensitive…words hurt…I rather you beat my @$$..the pain goes away a lot quicker.

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I hope what I’ve said doesn’t sound as if I’m judging your Mom – I just meant that I think I know how she feels, and why she may have said what she did. I believe that understanding can help to heal.

I still don’t know why I wrote it.:)

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DM – If you can’t remember it means one of two things: either nothing terrible happened to you, or it was SO terrible you’ve wiped it from your memory! Seriously, sometimes we only remember incidents from our own childhood when we have children ourselves. I would find my own memories surfacing when my kids were the same age as when something happened to me.

And I’m older than you, so my childhood was even longer ago! LOL!

I’d say that if you remember shouting matches with your parents and can’t remember why you were shouting, you had a pretty normal childhood. No parents are perfect, but yours were probably pretty good.