Technically, I suppose this isn’t a conversation, because a conversation is supposed to be a dialogue between two people. You know, the old tennis match analogy? Words are supposed to bounce back and forward between you like a tennis ball. Now it’s my turn, now it’s your turn – me, you, me, you …
This wasn’t like that. This was a conversation between OH, and … um … OH. He was talking to the one person who could always be relied upon to agree with him – himself!
You see, he writes forum software, and someone had found a security hole in the code and he was working on patching it. I was sitting in the lounge while he worked and this is what I heard:
OH: Shit.
OH: *Mumble mumble mumble*
(Pause)
OH: *Sigh*
(Lengthy pause)
OH: Stupid. Stupid. Stupid!
(Longer lengthy pause)
OH: Ah … !
(Pause filled with tapping of keyboard, and the occasional snap and flare of the cigarette lighter)
OH: That’s fixed it’s little wagon!
(More tapping)
OH (smugly): Who’s a clever boy, then?
*Sounds of someone closing laptop and getting out of chair*
OH: Do you want another cup of tea, Sweetheart … ?
(Another pause)
OH (supiciously): Um … why are you laughing?
I have those kind of conversations too. Only there’s no-one here during school hours to write them down, thank goodness. Mine are with myself. Or the dog.
At least he has stopped blaming other people for his dodgy code, he used to say things like what idiot did that?, and no one would like to say that he had and that he had forgotten about it
Katherine – Me too! Only I’m careful about who can hear me! LOL!
Drew – Aha! The truth is coming out now! Tell me more – I can always use a little leverage!
Hahaha…that is so funny. Don’t you just love overhearing conversations people have with themselves? I do it, too, but usually in my car. Alone.
Angis last blog post..Tales of spam mail
Ha ha! I am always doing that! Mo says “What did you say?” and I say. “Oh, I was talking to myself” She says “Oh” and carries on watching the telly or whatever.
“Stupid” followed soon by “Who’s a clever girl?” are words I often use ha ha! The important thing is that we tell ourselves off, and praise ourselves in equal measures!
Babs – beetles last blog post..Swinging sixties, in more ways than one!
**giggle giggle** You guys are so funny.
Jennys last blog post..Never Forget
So truly, was the line “Do you want another cup of tea, sweetheart?” directed at you or at himself? I guess it had to be you. If he was talking to himself, it would have been “clever boy.”
ROFL.
*laughing* Oh, HAL, my computer and I have some doozies. I should keep a note! What a beautiful lighter, Jay!
petra michelles last blog post..Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner
Angi – Me too – but occasionally I have to catch myself up in a more public place… If you make a habit of talking to yourself, it can be hard to break.
Babs – He’ll be so pleased to hear that other people go through the same routine! You’re absolutely right, we need to praise ourselves too, if we’re going to tick ourselves off. And never forget, talking to yourself guarantees that you’ll have an appreciative audience!
Jenny – Thanks! Our kids are funny, too. I’m so glad they have a decent sense of humour!
Ruth – ROFL!! Now that would have been funny! Imagine if I’d said ‘Yes please’ and he’d said ‘I wasn’t talking to you!’ LOL!
Petra – You should keep note! I’m sure we’d all LOVE to hear them!
The lighter is beautiful, isn’t it? Our elder son designed it. OH’s blog is Yellow Swordfish, you see, so he had a lighter personalised for him.
Hey! I make my own best conversation and never disagree with myself. Well almost never.
Now excuse me while I up my medication…
Mr. Nighttimes last blog post..The boy, the GameBoy, and the Shawshank Redemption.
HAHAHAHA…
Hilarious.
I always talk to myself and my father usually catches me.
meleah rebeccahs last blog post..9/11
I empathise totally. I am a chronic talker to self. I have arguments with people I was too chicken to confront, while I’m driving home in the car. I talk to equipment, particularly computers and cars. I go through imaginary scenarios and conversations with people I’d like to meet but never have . . .I think I may be mad . . or slightly entertaining!
Mr N – Oh, come now – the most interesting conversations are those with a little conflict! Allow yourself some disagreement from time to time!
And easy on the pills. Aren’t you taking enough already?
Meleah – See, the trick is to check the perimeter before opening your mouth. LOL!
Baino – I’ll go for entertaining! LOL!
Depp:
I have heard conversations like that while sitting in Borders bookstore. It’s both funny and annoying at the same time.
Happy trails
Swubirds last blog post..THE NUDISTS NEXT DOOR
I work alone, so I’ve developed this habit of talking to myself – just to make sure that I haven’t gone mute and deaf
Pretty soon I may need to start greeting myself good morning! Oh no, that will be too scary.
The Real Mother Hens last blog post..Know me?
Ha Ha! I just know one thing that your hubby loves his work. Jay, now be proud of him.:D
Scratch Bagss last blog post..Chinglish….Eh??
Swubird – In Borders it would be extremely annoying, but we always cut a little slack for the ones we love, don’t we?
Real Mother Hen – You know, people who believe in self-assertive methods of building confidence do just that! They wake in the morning, go to a mirror and say ‘Hi there, you wonderful person!’ Which is perfectly OK as long as nobody hears you!
LOL!
Scratch – Yes, he does! And I am proud of him, especially since he not only puts his stuff up as shareware, but solves problems and answers emails and PM as soon as he possibly can.
Oh, my… I would be laughing too! Next time, get out a recorder of some kind; video or even sound. We should all like to listen in on those conversations!
Have a great weekend Jay!
Maureens last blog post..Never Tell Me The Odds
“Who’s a clever boy then?” Heh, he talks to himself in the same tone as he might the dog.
No wonder you were laughing.
Jenns last blog post..Grocery Store Graceland and the Burger Barn Boobyhatch
That sounds like my husband! He works with computers and talks to himself, but then he usually turns to me and asks “who’s the man?” instead of “would you like some tea?”
Maybe I could get him to switch phrases, lol.
Maureen – It’s very tempting. One day I might just do that, and you can see him on YouTube! LOL!
Jenn – Ah, but we don’t talk like that to the dogs, which makes it even funnier!!
Kirsten – I’m guessing ‘who’s the man’ is similar to the ‘who’s a clever boy then’, so all you need to do is teach another phrase to tack onto the end!
I like your blog, by the way. I just tried to add it to my news feed, but it won’t work…